Thursday, 13 December 2018

Replace Explanation with Exploration

Replace Explanation with Exploration

As humans, we will rationalize almost anything so if you want to see that your partner is an evil selfish monster with three heads, you will find ways to believe that. But playing devil’s advocate, if you wanted to (which you probably don’t) you could also find reasons why your child is selfish and, at times, acts like a three-headed monster, couldn’t you?
I could have rattled off a lot of reasons why I felt what I felt—and it would have made sense to most people. But instead of trying to defend, or explain my feelings, I decided to instead explore them. I chose to get curious about why this bothered me. What thoughts did it make me think? What was I assuming about the situation? What conclusions was I drawing versus what was actually real? And, how did all those thoughts make me feel?
I could have called the other person selfish, but instead, I got super selfish (in a different way) and made it about me, rather than about them. I believe that taking the time to look within rather than rashly react to circumstances allows us to show up in a much more mindful way. A lot of what we talk about at Live Your Legend is making your moments more meaningful, and I don’t know about you, but I don’t feel particularly good about myself or my life if when I feel like I am going to (or worse off, do) explode with frustration.
This simple step is like putting brakes on a car that’s about to go out of control. That car will eventually come to a stop, but putting on those brakes makes it a bit more of a graceful stop.

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